im on my school right now while typing this entry. i think ill be absent for quite a while in the online world because my monitor at home is busted. something exploded inside it while my brother was using it. so there, it sucks big time. well, i dont have anything to fuzz about being absent in the online world since i think some people are avoiding me because i had a row with someone and i think they are siding with him (i may be wrong). Ang badtrip lang was, napre-empt ung story before hearing it on a first hand basis. pero yeah, whatever. i dont regret any of the things that i did. i stand with whatever i did.

i need to end this post since i have something to do in class. i just hope my montior get fixed as soon as time possible. ill be missing my friendster and multiply since they are blocked here in school. :)

LAYOUT
well, this isnt really a new layout. i just made a different banner up there ^^^. it is inspired by dishwalla's every little thing. i adore the song cause it exudes so much emotions from the lyrics to the interpretation. haha. and i used again that picture. that's my favorite picture above all the pictures i took. the picture is very emo, aint it? haha.

wala lang. i have no more stories to tell. ill post again maybe later :)

haha. went to andy's house. haha. joni and i had a hard time finding the place. and we freaking took the jeepney. i hate taking the jeep, no offense meant. i hate taking it it because i feel that all the dirt goes up to my face and the aroma of the thingies outside will be bluntly caught by your nose. haha. the ride a while ago was a mess cause we passed through 2 markets and 1 garbage truck. ask me the smell.... foul stench. haha. BUT BUT BUT, we had fun when we reached andy's house. we sure did eat a lot. hahaha. and then we sang our hearts out. i sang a lot. haha
1. a whole new world
2. now and forever
3. on bended knees
4. kahit kailan
5. wake me up before you go-go (haha)
i cant remember the other songs pa. hahaha
basta it was fun. i was so full. :))

HAPPY 21st BIRTHDAY TOL ANDY.

ILL TRY TO COME TOMORROW FOR YOUR HOUSE PARTY. HAHA. >:)

WHEN WAS LOVE SUPPOSED TO HURT THIS MUCH?



wala lang. i just decided to post this long poem i made a long, long time ago.
i know it's kinda long, but i love it. this poem is actually my favorite above all the poems i made. haha.

My Love will show you everything Today, today I bet my life You have no idea What I feel inside Don't, be afraid to let it show For you'll never know If you let it hide I love you You love me Take this gift and don't ask why Cause if you will let me I'll take what scares you Hold it deep inside And if you ask me why I'm with you And why I'll never Leave Love will show you everything One day When youth is just a memory I know you'll be standing right next to me

im in my school while typing this. hahaha. free time. :)) great. im just eating this waffer chocolate thing while plunging in my earphones and listen to mp3s. well anyway, there's really nothing to blog about since there was nothing important that happened the past few days. i just thought of jotting down an entry today since im quite bored. i wanna go home already. haha. i want a foot massage. haha. amp. weird no. haha :))

haha. it was a fun chat jackie. thanks for being nice to me, i didnt expect it. haha. and our little secret, shhh. haha. someone might kill me :))

first, i attended school. then we went to glorietta. we(my classmates) ate in G4. then headed to starbucks. i had white choco frap. anyway, after that, my friend drove me to ATC because sina jelz will meet me there. i met them in coffeebeans. then i ate chir's NYFD. after that, we got a cab outside ATC. then we reached cielo's big house. we ate there and then headed to the rooftop. sound trip and kwento lang. then andy came. we waited for joni and then she came na din. tita gene texted me that theyre going but i shouldnt tell cielo because theyre planning to surprise her. anyway, we waited for them. they got there around 9:45. kwento kwento lang. picture and stuff. i was really talkative. haha. teasing, laughing and blabla. time to leave, we got inside LBStarex. drove jelz to her house, and chir to ATC. andy left his fone at cielo's house so we came back. then they drove joni home. then me. haha. then i got home. sorry not in the mood to type the whole event. f-ing tired.
anyway, belated happy bday cielo. :))


click here for more picture (for contacts only)

amp, i typed a long, long entry. but my f-ing computer froze, so i had to restart it. and yeah, it was gone. amp. im not in any mood to repeat it. haha. just summarize everyhting.

we filed a case against that old hag who ran away. we will have her arrested.

i felt bad about not going to AC fair. i ssoooooo want to. but due to certain circumstances, i didnt. and it made me sick.
im so sorry amiela, yes i know i promised. sorry talagaaaa...
ill make it up next time. i swear.


wish i could be, every little thing you wanted..

whew. day had been a rollercoaster ride.
to start with, we listened again to DJ mo's FQ's. haha. but i only heard 19 onwards since i was picked up a little late. anyway, it was a good one, luis reached 40. haha. we had our module thing in cisco. i got 95.2 haha. secret why i got such a high grade >:) after cisco, we went to intramuros because of the f-ing foundation thing of my school and some of my professors required us to go there. haha. we had a hard time finding a parking. seriously. we drove around intramuros and it was quite a while before we found one. arrrgghh. anyway, it was f-ing hot. no shade at all, so we just decided to ate in mcdonalds. i was really hungry so i ordered 1pc chicken with rice, a large fries and a large coke light. i wasnt satisfied with my food since the fries aint really hot. anyway, after that, we just decided to go home. haha. we waited for jet again in manila doctors in macapagal. we bought again dirty ice cream. haha. while waiting, my mom called me saying that our maid ran away. SUPER WHAT THE FUCK?? so she told me to rush immediately. random thoughts flooded my mind like "shiet, im gonna do the dishes. im gonna clean thingies for a while and stuff like it".. hahaha. funny as it may seem, but i really suck in household chores. literally, i do not even clean my own room, i let the helper clean it for me. anyway, sherwin picked me up outside the village and drove me home. our house was a total mess. some plates were left, water bottles, peices of whatever. shit. i curse the bitch who ran away. she had just been here for 3 days. aarrgghh! but good thing Karma hit her before she even left, she accidentally cut her ankle with the edge of the door. oh man, it bled so much. haha. i was a little sympathetic with her the other night, and now im wishing her more pain for it. imagine, my mom even bought her medicines and stuff for her cut. she is such a loser. i cleaned all the mess in the house, for pete's sake, that took time. i was tired after. cleaning is not really my thing.. and by the way, since we're still looking for a helper, i now have a FAT chance of going to the AC fair. did u get the sarcasm in that? i was really looking forward for that, but when i heard our maid left, it brought my hopes down to its negative value. ampppp talaga!!!!!

So since I’m not your everything
How about I'll be nothing
Nothing at all to you
Baby I wont shead a tear for you
I won't lose a wink of sleep
Cause the truth of the matter is
Replacing you is so easy

heck!!!! our professor for 9-12pm class didnt show up again. oh shit, he is such a nightmare, i shouldve slept f-ing more. imagine, my next class after him was 3pm. sucks. anyway, i think it was better than hearing his voice that injects us with so much sleeping potion. haha. i normally count how many times i yawn during his class, the last time i had 30. haha. true. well, since we didnt have anything to do till 3pm, we went to glorietta, we just commuted(sp?) because if we take the car, we may not be able to find parking again since the school's parking lot is so much limited, glorietta's near our school, anyway. we just ate there. magic wok. haha. and then my friend and i strolled, we saw maui taylor(Sp?)and enrico villanueva. moving on, we went to gold crest to buy some stuff for our fones. i bought a black rubberized case for my razr v3x since the crystal case i have sucks big time since it tends to do scratches on the side of my fone. i was planning to have my c261 open-lined but it cost 800 so i just shut up. haha. my friend bought stylus for her fone since she lost her stylus months ago. haha. and a screen protector. anyway, we spent a lot in glorietta. then we waited for a friend to accompany us back to school. haha. she paid for the cab because she was late. haha. anyway, after we left school, we fetched jet in madocs. haha. i went out of the car and bought dirty ice cream, well, theyre not really dirty. he said he'll treat us for sundae in mcdo. haha. so we went to mcdo macapagal blvd. he bought rice burger for himself and sundaes for us. thanks. haha. then went home. i got online and i was shocked from some revelations from a friend. i need not expound more on that. and until now, im still shocked by it. haha weird much.

SAN PABLO NO MORE

so, our supposedly trip to san pablo laguna for the town fiesta later was cancelled.. err, not really cancelled. i s'pose tito david wasnt able to find a van. haha. and they said that we'll leave san pablo ng madaling araw. scary much. haha. im 80% sure about going on AC fair, though.

CHANGE

im on a constant confusion about change. why do i find it hard to cope up with change? sudden realization struck me in the head. people change, attitudes do. i used to believe in the famous cliche "dont ever change", as what i said, USED to. not anymore. why not? because it's not going to happen. people change, some for the better, some for not so. my mind is redolently polluted with senile thoughts about changing. why do people have to change? why do they have to change and hurt people even with the farthest intention? maybe i just miss the old person i once believed in. nah, i still believe in. benevolently speaking, the acts of change may bring future good. still, the fact remains that i, msyelf, find it hard to cope up with drastic change. i just somehow wish to go and drag myself way back on day 1 and feel the same rush of excitement that engulfed me before. to top it all up, the feeling of being left out or left behind because you cant go with their flow is simply painful. so much to do and so much to say, change hurt people. so now, why do people change? because it hurts people and yet it gives them lessons.

my favorite lines whether movies or songs or etc

landon:"are you scared of death?"
jaime:"im scared of not being with you"
-a walk to remember

"love means never having to say you're sorry"
-a book entitled love story

"until you decide to wake up"
-wake up by coheed and cambria

"im not asking for too much, baby just stick around"
-stick around by azure

"each place i hide, it only reminds me of you"
-only reminds me of you by christian bautista

"im laughing cause no one knows the joke is on me, while im dying inside with my pride and a smile on my face"
-smile by tamia

"how could you look into my eyes, ignoring my tears?"
-later by side a

"nanlalamig na ba pag ibig mo?"
-hiling by paramita

"because i knew you, i have been changed for good"
-for good from wicked the musical

"i cant let you slip away, tonight..."
-last chance by allure

"from this day on remember this, that you're the only one that i adore. cant we make this last forever?"
-no ordinary love by jennifer love hewitt

"and i dont know what to do, cause ill never be with you.."
-you're beautiful by james blunt

"if it's just infatuation, why is my heart aching?"
-if im not inlove with you by faith hill

"if u only knew, how much i wanna run to you"
-run to you by whiney H.

"your love completes my existence, youre the other half that makes me whole.. youre the only half that makes me whole.."
-make me whole by amiel larrieux

my internet connection is still on it's shitty condition, according to globe broadband, service will normalize around february. fuck. february? im going nuts already. this is it for now, might edit later.

haha. so i wasnt able to go online yesterday night. i enjoyed sleep so much. haha. anyway, there was something that really destroyed my day yesterday. when i woke up, i checked my fones for any messages, and surprise! surprise!, all my messages in my C261 fone were all gone. that was so shitty. i have lots of treasured messages there since i text there more than on my v3x. sobrang sayang!!!! anyway, i havent heard yet any details about the fiesta thing in san pablo. tito david said kasi he'll bring a van to accomodate us all. haha. anyway, im thinking twice if i should go to AC fair since i dont wanna look like a total loner there. i know amiela and sina sam will be busy with other people/errands so, im thinking pa. and i have no ride on fridays and i dont know how to enter AC and it'll be f-ing late, 7-12am haha. and by the way, i love the songs on kuya christian's new album. matter of fact, i asked leola to rip some songs for me. haha. piracy. haha. no. i swear ill buy his album after sam's album is out. anyway, sam promised to give free copies. ahaha. if ever he does, ill buy kuya ian's immediately. haha. so there.

i try to run from your side, but each place i hide, it only reminds me of you

i seriously need a diet program haha. amp. i cant go to the gym, my sched wont allow it haha

this morning, my friend and i were tuned in to DJ mo's FQ's. haha. we were laughing inside the car on our way to school on some words, but hero's interview was a little disappointing coz he was too aloof in answering the questions straight.
anyway, since we didnt have thesis 1 meeting, we went to glorietta. weeee A LOT OF PARKING. haha. then we went to timezone. i was surprised when i checked my card and it has 80+ pesos on it. cool much, we played basketball. after that, we went to food choices since i was craving for world chicken. i had tuna fettuccini(sp?) and spanish rice together with the chicken. hahaha. we spent a long time eating and talking. after that, i headed to starbucks and bought peppermint mocha and had another sticker. im not really aiming for the journal, but for the sake of having it stamped, i did nalang. i spent 400++ this day. super WTF, right?
then back to school. hahaa then went home

anyway, i was chatting with a friend a while ago, and i cant believe how arrogant she got. we were really close back then but she left without further ado and told us to just forget about her. i thought i was lucky to have caught her this afternoon, turned out i was wrong. she talked to me as if we were never friends. she told stuff like "do i have to ask for your permission in anything i do?" and "just forget about me" and "if you'll excuse me, im really busy". those words resounded in my head, how could she have said those words? and mind u, we really used to be SO CLOSE. so yeah, im kinda hurt with the way she acted towards me. well, damaged has been done, no need to say anything. so i guess this is it by now. i gotta go, dinner is approaching.

oh, she messaged me again saying sorry that she was being a jerk. of course, i accepted that, after all, she's been one of the best girl friends i had. so yeah, bye bye. im starving.


i easily forgive, but i dont forget

this song got my attention
specifically this line

"i can have another you by tomorrow
so dont u ever for a second get to thinking
you're irreplaceable"

nothing much, blimey, nothing much has been happening with my darn life, just the usual stuff. and guess what? i hate it. haha

i effin miss u amiela sweetie.

i wanted to be like you
i wanted everything
so i tried to be like you
and ive got swept away..

i didnt go to school today, basically because there isnt really anything to do but just discuss the course outline which is, by the way, redundant.

my broadband is still sucky. i cant wait for it to get fixed. i better call globelines haha. they annoy me so much.

anyway, last night tito david texted about watching nestle JETS event in market market 4-6pm today. i think sam will be there to perform. id love to go, but i wont. i wont go until.... im not saying here. hehe. anyway, i think thats it for now. nothing much is going on now a days. such a boring life. haha


until you decide to wake up..

i wrote this quite a long time ago..

i called u, but u ignored me
i messaged u but u didnt bother reading
i held your hand but u took it off
i saw u with someone else and my heart bled
i swallowed my pride and begged for your love
i kept all the hurt and still u dont want to look at me
i risked my life, my soul and my identity but i got nothing but a blank stare
how cruel can u get sometimes
i loved u and i am still, but where are u?
can i still keep up with my fakest smile
while feeling your fakest touch?
can i still carry on with my fakest laugh
seeing you with your fakest care?
can i still survive with my fakest life
knowing u are showing your fakest love?


i take one step away, but i find myself coming back to you

haha. there's nothing really important to blog about since nothing much had happened lately. ill try to refrain from making my blog a lyrics page. haha. but i cant help it. ahah

some may think this song is lousy or corny or whatever. but i like it. haha

kulang na kulang

Sa tuwing magkasama
Parang bale wala
Nagmumukhang hangin
Dumaang bale wala
Ni ayaw mo, hawakan aking kamay

Kulang na kulang ba
Hindi pa ba sapat
Inubos kong lahat
Panahon ko sa yo
Anong gagawin
Di mo pinapansin
Etong damdamin
Aking paglalambing

Minsan ako'y nakahalata
Ika'y tulala
Malalim ang iniisip
Malayo ang tingin
aking nalaman
Nabaling sa iba
ang nilalaman ng iyong damdamin

(back to kulang na kulang...)

Buong magdamag nagisip kung baket
paano nangyari ito sa akin
Ayaw mo na pala bat di mo sinabi
nagsawa ka na.. paano na?

if it's just infatuation....

why is my heart aching?

i adore this song

This is my last dance with you
This is my only chance to do all I can do
To let you know that what I feel for you is real

This is the last chance for us
This is the moment that I just cannot let end
Before I know that theres a chance were more than friends

So dont let go, dont let go
Make it last all night
This is my last chance to make you mine

I kept my feelings so deep
I kept my dreams of you and me somewhere inside
Although I prayed that you would see it in my eyes

But this is my last chance to say
Whats in my heart before you stay out of my life
And then youll understand the way I feel inside

So hold me close cause it feels so right
This is my last chance to make it mine
Make this dream reality
So close and yet so far
Gotta find a way into your heart
Gotta speak my mind
Gotta open up to you this time
I cant let you slip away tonight
This is my last dance iwth you

This is my only chance to do all I can do
To let you know that what I feel for you is so real
So dont let go
Just make it last all night long
This is my last chance to make you mine, yeah
To make you mine

aarrggghhhh
1st day of school tomorrow and i frikken hate it. i dont wanna go to school anymore. waaahhh!!!!

anyway, happy birthday mom.

last night was fun. there were lots of fireworks. my dad bought a lot. as in A LOT. my eardrums nearly broke. anyway, the village was very bright due to the non-stop fireworks display and the christmas lights from different houses.

around afternoon time, i went to SM to have my haircut. my hair is freaking short now, but i prefer it compared to my untidy hair before. after i had my haircut, i went to body tune to buy a gift certificate for a thai massage for my mom's birthday. it was my brother's present for her. then, i went to the supermarket to buy ice cream. i bought two, a limited edition chocolate mousse and a double dutch lite. i aslo bought dental floss. after that, i met up with my cousin. i rode with their new CR-V. so comfy. haha. it has a cute feature too, it will bug you to death until you wear the seatbelt. haha. they dropped me at my house because they just live a few blocks away. i left the ice cream in their car because it wont fit in to our freezer, and they have two fridge. haha. i just stayed inside the house, watched tv and surfed the net. my cousins and dad were doing some fireworks outside. my tita called the house and asked us to pick up the baked mac there. my brother drove me to their house and we also brought the ice creams with us. the baked mac smelled really good inside the car. hahaa. when we got back home, i realized i left my freaking fone on my tita's house and i couldnt ask my brother to drive me again since he was doing something so i walked. its just a few blocks away but i had to find an alternate route since people were throwing paputok all over the place. whew. haha. my dad lighted most of the fireworks even before 12am. haha. i didnt hold any. haha. i just contented myself from taking pictures and covering my ears. we had to park the two cars a little away from our house since the fireworks might hit them. they kept on alarming though. haha.

     

then we ate. i was so full. my tummy nearly broke. haha. the cake from red ribbon just fell on the floor because it slipped my brother's grasps. sayang. anyway, after that, my brother and other cousin when to my cousins house, we didnt walk since there might be stray paputok all over the place. haha. we got drunk, not really. haha. we had tequilla(sp?) and margarita. it was great. hahaha. jamming, they were doing the guitar thing and i did the vocals. wtf? haha. it was fun though. haha went home around 5 freaking am. haha.